The art of observation.

Over the ages painters have struggled to capture the elusive effects of light.


In this image the author would appear to have done so very well. On reflection, the reader may well conclude that almost anyone could get that image with a cheap digital camera and the use of paint packages which are freely available online.

That’s exactly what I did. The odds of me standing there for a couple of hours with a canvas, an easel, and a bunch of half-frozen oil pigments and dirty brushes and cans of turpentine are minimal.

I’m using tools that were simply unavailable to Vincent van Gogh or Paul Gauguin or any other famous painter.

The thing took a little effort, and I had to know how to use the tools. I kind of have to know what’s good because I actually took a number of photos and tried a few different things with some of them. The photos were taken impulsively. It’s the ice pack along the south shore of Lake Huron at Bright’s Grove. When I took them, I had no idea of what I was going to do with them or what the result might be, although the special effects did enter my mind. Yet there is a kind of spontaneity here as well.

I like that unexpected quality, the element of surprise that enters into it.

The landscapes around here in winter can be pretty sublime. It’s also a big, open, flat kind of place where you sort of have to look off into the distance a lot. The light is very angled and the palette muted, and the weather and atmospheric effects generate a random picture that changes constantly.

It’s the art of observation.

Arkona, Ontario.

Digital photo of Arkona, Ontario. Paint effects include sharpening, oil painting and render/stylize ('outline')features as well as adjustment to hues, curves, and brightness/contrast.

Covered bridge, Petrolia, Ontario.

This is a digital photo shot with a Samsung ST-67. I shot 29 images, not all of the bridge, which is located in a park in the middle of Petrolia, Ontario, population about three thousand or so.

The image was manipulated using a free download called PAINT.Net. The effects include adjusting the brightness and contrast, and the 'oil painting' effect, as well as 'sharpening,' located in the 'photo' tab.

It's good to get out of the car once in a while, and the temperature was about four degrees Celsius, a sunny day about 11 a.m. In winter and late fall, the shadows are always angled as we are about...I don't know, maybe forty-four degrees north of the equator.

Interestingly, one of the belts came off the engine, and I drove home with no power steering. We'll call it an adventure and leave it at that.

Edited for content.

Just because this photo has been edited for as he grasped her firm white buttocks content, that doesn't mean aardvarks live in the desert will like it.

Big Louie's Poem.

(http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/2.0/ photo by Tor Kristensen)

I get messages from God and I just laugh.

It’s a coping strategy.

I’m writing this with one eye.

Backwards. With my left foot.

And I’m really drunk too.

Guilt is a terrible thing to waste.


Everything you see around you is a message.


What are you doing, Honey?”

“Screwing, Grandma!”

“That’s a good girl, just promise me you won’t smoke.”

We all lay awake at night worrying about stuff.

Into every life a little shit must fall.

You give me everything I need.


A Dutchman with a shoe fetish.


The cat tried to eat this.

Young men today have some kind of literacy problem.

The time has come to speak of many things.

In my day we’d take ‘em out back.

Some guys just don’t listen.

Bow to the inevitable—but twist it to your advantage.


A skeleton fell out of the closet.


You’re trying to tell me you need help.

What are you afraid of?

You have to understand the rules before you can break ‘em.

Pain is reality. Everything else is a cheap imitation.

There’s no such thing as a happy ending.

Respect yourself—if you can.


You get what you pay for.


Control your passions.

Submit and rule.

If I weren’t such an obnoxious dink, I’d have a lot of followers.

The Forrest Gump of angst.

I with I could find someone to look up to.

I eat cougars for breakfast.


No one cares what you think.


I write for the critics.

It’s just theatre.

The disabled want you.

That cynicism runs awful deep.

A paroxysm of creativity.

A shovel full of soap, sir.


When revelation hits, she hits with a bang.


Talk your way out of a wet paper bag.

“How do you like your coffee?”

“Unambiguous.”

Get a mouthpiece.

It’s hot, but, it’s the humidity what kills you.

Crime should be reported.

That way we get better statistics.


Don’t get mad, spin the fuckin’ table.


What are you implying?

Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em.

Chicken Soup for Assholes.

A little boy’s voice crying in the dark, wet forest.

I have nothing better to do than to write for you people.

Promise me you’ll look after each other.


Your momma must have had some sour milk.


As dumb as two sticks.

It don’t mean nothing.

“Stuff it sideways.” – Cicero

LOVE YOUR ENEMIES.

It’s a poem—get over it.

“That was beautiful, baby.” – Cicero.


Paddle backwards, fast—like a politician.


Inside the bishop’s palace.

Pull out the big stick.

Ships and sails, puppy-dog’s tails.

Sealing wax, and cabbages, and kings.

Get it out—get it all out.

When in doubt, improvise, adapt, overcome.


Does this mean we aren’t friends anymore?


I played strip poker with forty penguins.

It’s all about you—right?

That’s the best I can do for right now.

Sorry about all that.

The show is over.

Hickory dickory dock; a mouse ran up my foot.


Come one, come all, one size fits all.

We have something for everyone.


Just do it.