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Mr. Robot.

by Louis Bertrand Shalako

c2010

All Rights Reserved

I, robot
Don’t have the capacity
To dream about tomorrow
But I never spell a word wrong
Fueled up, brains all loaded
With everything that’s passed
And I have no place to go
I can never die
As long as the batteries last

Here I come
Here I come
Here I come

I have never speculated
As to where I came from
Did I spring from the dust?
Was I created?
I’ve never cared. I’ve never asked.
Simply because it’s easier
In the Good Lord I trust

Here I come
Here I come
Here I come

Cryogenic heart, skin a polished silver
One thing I am glad of
For this I thank my builder
I can never rust.
And in my own self-assumptions;
I place my deepest trust
I, robot; am happy within myself.

Here I come
Here I come
Here I come…

Editor's Note;

This poem originally appeared in 'Twisted Tongue Magazine,' #16, UK.

Wiener. Digital watercolour.

Untitled. Preliminary work.

Sales Trends.

by Louis Bertrand Shalako

c2010

All Rights Reserved


Right now my best selling title is, 'Heaven Is Too Far Away,' despite a mediocre cover. The subject matter involves the hunt for the Red Baron, and is clearly labeled 'comedy,' and 'adult content.'

The second best seller, is 'The Case of the Curious Killers,' which is an accessible sci-fi parody and the cover is decent.

Third place goes to 'The Paranoid Cat and other tales,' and that's probably due to a number of factors. One, it's a catchy title, two, it's a cat, three, it has a humourous sound...and it is short stories as opposed to a 100,000-word novel.

The dog of the group, my sentimental favourite, and pretty predictable as the cover is quite forbidding, is of course, 'Core Values,' a wonderful title that scares the crap out of people. Even when reading horror, I think people prefer to escape from reality rather than confront a whole bunch of social issues. It's as funny as the others, but you have to work at it a little more...that one starts off kind of slow and very bleak.

It was a dumb decision to sacrifice commercial considerations for the sake of artistic purity. This may seem nuts, but it is the language, rather than any other material in the books that makes them 'adult content.'

Other than that it's learn as we go around here. We just uploaded our third revision of 'The Case of the Curious Killers,' (the paperback,) in about a week. But to continuously improve the product is one advantage of my system.

That swearing was a serious mistake for a number of reasons. I'm basically just too lazy to fix it. These books will find their audience, of that I am sure. The subsequent books have either less swearing or none.